Post #ANC54, Which Rapper Is In Which SA Politician's WhatsApp Group?

I'm not one to have in-depth knowledge about our political personalities, but I know some things about rappers and from a low level conversation about our politicians, it's interesting how some of them have similarities with some of the leading rap moguls. So here’s a little take on their WhatsApp groups.

Birdman and Jacob Zuma:

Now, if you follow Birdman’s story you'll know that he made himself what he is from impossible odds. His mother died when he was 2 years old, then he went from being homeless, to selling heroine, eventually signing a 30 million dollar deal with Universal Music in the 90’s, and then running one of the longest standing labels owned by a rapper, Cash Money Records. Baby is almost like a miracle baby and was highly respected and loved just like Jacob Zuma who has a standard one certificate, a couple of hundred alleged charges that include rape and money laundering, but none of those things could stand in the way of the people loving him enough to make him South Africa’s president. So what went wrong with both? Baby owed a couple of artists and producers but the straw that broke the camel was his debt to Lil Wayne whom he treated like a son. Wayne is respected for his artistry by veteran artists like Jay-Z, to new comers like Chance The Rapper. The fact that Baby keeps showing off his luxury life while one of hip hop's most prized artists that discovered Tyga, Drake, and Nicki Minaj suffers doesn't go well with most of the hip hop industry names that matter. Similar to Jacob Zuma with the many charges that he's facing including Nkandla, The Gupta'ss state capture, and an additional 781 alleged counts, the people eventually got fed up and just like that Birdman and Zuma are in the same WhatsApp group called “Most Loved To Most Hated.”

50 Cent and Julius Malema:

Here are a few things that are similar with 50 Cent and Julius Malema.

• Juju got booted out of the ANC and we might have thought it was over with him and boom, we now have the EFF. 50 Cent sold more than ten million records on his first and second albums, but from then his sales started plummeting. If hip hop was the ANC, his music credentials were essentially scrapped till he made a huge comeback on television with Power. He recently signed a multimillion deal to produce more movies.
• Lets talk about the tendency to expose things. Whenever citizens feels like they are being bullsh%!ed by politicians, they all turn to Malema for answers. Malema has become notorious for exposing things before they come to light. I mean, he confirmed Cyril Ramaphosa was ANC’s new president an hour before it was announced and when the announcement was delayed he kept us updated by letting us know there’s a recount. 50 Cent has been exposing rappers from Rick Ross’ previous career as a warden as well as his income shortages, to exposing Jimmy Henchman's legal documents or letting us know how Ja Rule was robbed.
• On face value, 50 has an aggressive persona sort of identical to Juju’s approach whenever he's on a podium driving his campaigns. These two are in the same WhatsApp group called “We Got Files On U.”

Cyril Ramaphosa and Diddy:

I know you're all thinking the similarity should be with Jay-Z but no, Jay-Z was a hustler that rapped and wanted to be successful. Diddy, on the other hand, wanted to be a boss from the word go. His multiple business roster have been going on since the 90’s with a record label, fashion brand, perfume, liquor, water, a network, and he's now contemplating buying an NFL team. Cyril Ramaphosa's business ambitions under his Shanduka holding company have interests in resources, telecoms, food and beverage, property, financial services, energy, and industrial sectors.

Puff is in the running to be the first rapper to make a billion and Cyril might be the only active politician that’s already got it. In the same way that Puff was able to bring in brands to the culture by making them cool, the word is that Cyril was able to build partnerships with various players in the economy to build his empire. Puff is a billionaire in rands, Cyril is also a billionaire in rands. Same WhatsApp group probably called “Billionaire Boys.”

In closing, of course we need to check for the ladies and Nkosazana Zuma is definelty in the same group as Nicki Minaj cause her ex is probably quarter past jail time. This WhatsApp group should be called “Serving Time.”

We're just having fun and this is my limted political knowledge but if you feel there should be more groups please feel free to share in the comments.